SETTING GOALS
As you know I’m a firm believer of setting goals.. I really believe that goals are just like our dreams.. except they have deadlines. (ha ha)
The other day I was having a conversation with a friend (she’s very very organized) and she was telling me how … “You know how you are all about setting goals so you have a road map, well I was reading an article that basically said if you want to succeed you have to be organized” …
I was like… BUT… don’t you see? You have to have to goal first. You have to have that clear definite purpose that everything revolves around.. The fact is… She and I think differently.
We have very similar values, morals, lifestyles and more… but we literally think differently.
I think in terms of… start to finish… my clear definite purpose, the next step, the next step and so on… with measurements along the way. In MANY cases my measurements are based more on how I am feeling about a situation or circumstance compared to when I started. (which really means that some successes can’t be measured with a ruler, they can only be measured with your heart)
My friend thinks in terms of “organizing”….. but as I’m writing this… I realize that she doesn’t really think in terms of organizing, that’s just her tool. (Just like I might … and I stress MIGHT use organizing as a tool) In fact, My friend uses organizing as her preferred tool.
Her kitchen pantry is organized so she doesn’t waste money at the grocery store purchasing things she already has. (I don’t waste money on food, but I wouldn’t call my kitchen organized)
Her finances are organized in a spreadsheet so she can anticipate and cover expenses and costs of running a household. (I have a Google calendar that tells me what I have to pay, when I have to pay it)
Her home is clean and tidy… (we all know that leads to less stress and chaos which leads to happiness… and well, I’ll a little messy)
Her holiday decorations, yard tools, cleaning tools, car interior… all cleaned up and put away until they need to be used. That saves money, because if you can’t find it when you need it, you are more apt to go buy another one… (I waste a ton of money every year, because I’m not good at taking care of my decorations… sigh)
Organization is her major definite TOOL… but what is her purpose?
You could say her “GOAL” is to save time and save money.
Now, for you organized individuals, I haven’t said anything new (yet). For you people like me that drive the organized people crazy… we could learn a couple of things. BEING ORGANIZED SAVES TIME.
And you’ve heard the old saying, TIME IS MONEY. 🙂
My point? What is the goal… You see, for me.. I am always moving forward, trying to better something. Either my finances or my children’s quality of life, or … my garden, my house… something. I always have a purpose moving me forward.
My friend, my incredibly organized and tidy friend… is a status quo person. That means, her major definite purpose is to keep everything exactly as it currently is.
Yes, she has a goal to pay off her car loan, BECAUSE she will need a new car loan by that time to get a second car for her then driving teenager.
I, on the other hand, have a goal to be financial free. To literally change my circumstances … to help other people change their circumstances… I want to bring as many people forward to the lifestyle of their dreams by helping them achieve their goals as possible. I am NOT a status quo person.
And I never have been.
I have 3 friends that are organizational miracles and they are great! They help me so much by example and I think that’s their special gift. That is the thing that they can do better than anyone else, that is the thing that they can offer and I… what I can do is inspire.
I want to inspire them… to… dream a dream… then use those fantastic organizing skills to make that dream happen.
My point is GOAL GOAL GOAL
My point is to THRIVE… not just survive.
For the moment, I’d like you to write down your wildest dream, if money were no object what one thing would you do in the next 24 hours. Remember, money is no object.
Let’s use an easy example. Take the family to Disney World.
So, we go online and find out that you will need $5000.00 to book flights, or rent a car to drive there… you will need that much to cover the hotel, meals and park tickets… for the week… and that’s if you want to do it right, without having to count pennies every moment. So, your Major Definite Goal is $5000.00 to go to Disney.
See, you can have a money goal, but if there is no heart attached to it… if there is no emotionally attachment, you will find it hard to put the money aside.
OK. Let’s get started. You have bills, you are barely making it from week to week… but you have this goal for Disney.
Break it down.
If you put $97.00 aside a week, you will be at Disney in 1 year. $45.00 aside a week, you will be at Disney in 2 years. Get it. The 3 year plan, requires that you put $20.00 a week aside, and in three years you and your family will go to Disney and have a vacation like none other!
You can do this. You need just enough emotional attachment to this goal to give you the power to push through the harder weeks… and the discipline to really make the decision to do it, to get there.
So, what about the other little things that suck the fortunes from your grasp…. that’s right, I’m going to say it… BANK FEES.
…. sigh… Because of my lack of organization, I wasn’t tracking my bank fees very carefully.. Ok, I wasn’t tracking them at all.
My bank was playing a little game that was costing me a bundle… they were putting through withdrawals before my deposits on the same day, EVEN THOUGH, my deposit was made BEFORE the withdrawals.
The short story, I paid over $750.00 in bank fees which consisted of $30.00 overdraft for every payment that was made before the deposit hit, and then some incredible MAC machine fees. I got hit, $2.00-$3.00 per transaction from the MAC Bank and another $3.00 from my bank.
SO… taking out cash to save money at the cash only gas station. dumb
SO… taking out cash to pay someone back the $1.50 you borrowed, just cost $6.50. right?
However… with my life style and spending habits, I really don’t want to keep cash on me… so… I switched banks.
BUT… I NEVER WOULD HAVE KNOWN… it wouldn’t have been thrown in my face until I signed up for www.mint.com. You know, you think you know. You see the charges come through and you’re frustrated but you let it go and you move on… when this little app told me I was up to $750.00 in bank charges for the year!!!! I couldn’t believe it and wouldn’t have realized it, if it weren’t for that tool.
Bank fees is an example of how the right tool (in my case the mint.com app) helped me identify and ultimately solve my problem (because the app pointed out my fees and suggested several banks that didn’t have those fees)
Cell Phone.
Cable Bills.
Magazine or Online Subscriptions.
These are all areas where the service can be negotiated or changed for a lower fee… You know, My ex-husband pays $55.00 a month for his pay as you go, unlimited cell service. I pay $45.00 and I have unlimited everything but minutes. I have 1200 minutes. I’ve never gone over them… and I am saving myself $120.00 a year by paying $10.00 less a month. It adds up!
I think you get the point. Set your goal, set your goal date. Then organize your life around that goal as your major definite purpose.
(in case you’re wondering why I keep saying Major
Definite Purpose… it’s because we are all multi-faceted. I’m not just the money I want to save, or the business I am running, or the Mom to the children I am raising… I have many purposes.
We are like beautiful diamonds sparkling – multi-dimensional, multi-faceting. We are and mean many things to many people, the challenge is to have our major goal… and organize everything around that major goal while still achieving and enjoying and living a life filled with other triumphs and other goals!
MINDFULNESS AND GOAL SETTING
What does all this have to do with mindfulness? Our conscious attention to the moment does not mean that goals aren’t needed. As we consciously attend to fulfilling our roles on the planet. Deepak Chopra tells us that we all have a true nature. He tells us that money will not solve our basic problems in existence… All of our relationships are a mirror of the relationship with ourselves.
If we are unhappy with our situation, we are really unhappy with ourselves.
If we have insecurity or guilt or even fear over money, then these feelings are mirrors of the basic aspects of our personality.
There are several things that I want to say… and they will take pages and pages to get it out… so, I think for starters it’s important for us to … be.
You do not need to leave your room. Remain sitting at your table and listen. Do not even listen, simply wait, be quiet still and solitary. The world will freely offer itself to you to be unmasked, it has no choice, it will roll in ecstasy at your feet. Franz Kafka
This is my absolute favorite quote.
It reminds me, that the world is more than what I see. The universe, God, Nature all requires my attention and the only way I can see any of them is by being still. Being Quiet. Listen.
Prayer and Meditation are the single most important tool to Health Wellness and Success. I wouldn’t have believed it if I hadn’t experienced it first hand, but it’s like a boomerang.
The moment. THE PRECISE MOMENT, you STOP thinking constantly about how someone else has hurt you, or how someone else owes you, or how some situation, person or circumstance of your past has made you who you are… and you start to concentrate on your potential… on who you can be, and what you can do with joy… you will find it easier to start concentrating on and meditating and praying FOR other people and being THANKFUL for the things and people and circumstances (no matter how trying) you have in your life… THAT Precise moment you are flinging out into the giant field of life that positive energy… that feeling of good fortune and abundance will boomerang.
Whether other people will be drawn to you because they sense the change, or you will be drawn to more positive people… we can not know. You will experience change.
It comes back around and will make it easier and easier for you to be thankful and balanced and healthy and encouraged.
I’ve said it before… and I know that you’ve heard it before… but if you want to be wealthy, you first need to give.
You need to give in order to receive.
You need to give… without any expectation of receiving anything, give from the heart… with a heart that’s thankful and caring and filled with love. It’s the law of cause and effect. (looking for a place to give, I’ll insert my paypal account here! HA HA HA HA)
Seriously, it’s simple to see.
If you could watch a busy intersection of motorist as they rush to work. You would see that the people who are rude and belligerent leave a wake of negative and rude energy that affects the drivers in their path.. However, consider this… Fair and calm drivers all taking turns and making sure that everyone gets to their destination would leave a calm and positive wake…
What? I heard you say, “Yeah right, like that’s going to happen” AND I suggest you be that person. REGARDLESS of what other drivers do “to you” (I put that in quotes, because they aren’t really doing anything TO you, they don’t even know you… they are doing FOR themselves… so it’s really not personal) YOU be the driver that nips the negative wake. You be the driver that pays attention and is fair and let’s the guy that’s been waiting for 50 cars to cut in front of you.
You are what you think. If you are poor… guess what, if you think you are poor, you will be poor. You are what you think. If you are in a rush… you will be rushed.
Let’s just recap:
Goals:
Know exactly what your goal is
Set a deadline
Plan the action steps to reach your goal in realistic steps
Find someone to help you remain accountable, either a coach or leadership team or women’s club
Giving in order to receive
Find ways to give to other
Find ways to enrich other’s life’s
Fill your heart with thankfulness
Remain positive and surround yourself with positive influences
Have a great day!
