…on happiness

One of the things that I struggle with is understanding is how to be unhappy.  I believe that I am blessed with those rosy glasses that help me to forget past slights and to focus on today and the happiness of the moment.

No, I’m not a Pollyanna all rainbows and butterfly type of person and I’ve certainly had my fill of challenges… I just… I guess maybe I don’t remember the most devastating or debilitating of those challenges and I can’t seem to find it in myself to blame anyone but myself for my current state.

I do, however, recall my turning point… the point where I stopped blaming my parents, my education, my height, my body shape, my job for my current circumstances or  any other number of grievances that I may have had when I was a teenager and up to my mid-twenties.

I was 25 years old and I remember when I realized that … when my mother was 25, she had 2 children and a third on the way.  That’s when I realized that that my parents did the best they knew how, better then I would have done right that moment.   They did what they thought was right, and they did better then some, maybe even better then most and it was up to me to “be” or “do” something with myself now.

I, not events, have the power to make me happy or unhappy today. I can choose which it shall be. Yesterday is dead, tomorrow hasn't arrived yet. I have just one day, today, and I'm going to be happy in it.  ~ Groucho Marx

So, I stood at that “entitlement” crossroad…. I could continue to feel like someone owed me something for the pain or neglect or broken promises, or I could take the other path… the very scary path… of admitting that I was…. I am in control of my life and any failures or successes were mine.


I decided, every morning, to be happy… to seek happiness, to feel happy and find happiness in everything… and eventually it became a habit.  A habit to wake up happy, fulfilled and in control of my destiny.

Happiness goes hand in hand with thankfulness and I personally found it easier to be happy, when I am filled with thankfulness. I took the time every morning to thank God for the sunny day or ground nourishing rainy day, great tasting coffee, quiet soul replenishing morning, hot water, green grass… the list goes on and on.  I found a heart bursting with thankfulness, is a heart and mind filled with joy and happiness.  This was the decision I made every morning and I habit I have to this day.

Don’t get me wrong, some days I’m cranky… however, my habit is to check my mood… and attack any negativeness before it can take hold of me and work it’s way into my day.  Since I made this decision, I have been a very happy person.

I’m not the only person that feels this way…

Everything can be taken from a man but one thing: the last of human freedoms – to choose one’s attitude in any given set of circumstances, to choose one’s own way.
Viktor E. Frankl 

I, not events, have the power to make me happy or unhappy today. I can choose which it shall be. Yesterday is dead, tomorrow hasn’t arrived yet. I have just one day, today, and I’m going to be happy in it. 
Groucho Marx

I am determined to be cheerful and happy in whatever situation I may find myself. For I have learned that the greater part of our misery or unhappiness is determined not by our circumstance but by our disposition. 
Martha Washington 

Learn to enjoy every minute of your life. Be happy now. Don’t wait for something outside of yourself to make you happy in the future. Think how really precious is the time you have to spend, whether it’s at work or with your family. Every minute should be enjoyed and savored. 
Earl Nightingale 

Most folks are as happy as they make up their minds to be.
Abraham Lincoln 

If you want a happy ending, that depends, of course, on where you stop your story. 
Orson Welles 

I enjoy and connect with all of these quotes and I am particularly fond of the last one from Orson Welles.  It tells us that we are in control and can write our own story…. it urges us to continue the story to the happy ending and to continue to write until we get there.  Don’t spend another minute on whatever circumstances you’ve allowed to make you unhappy.  Decide, for the best outcome for yourself to be happy.  Today, be happy.

If you are unhappy, I encourage you to have the strength of will and courage to continue your story to your happy ending.  Don’t stop your story here, with other people and circumstances in control of your happiness… Taking control of your life starts with you, defining yourself on your own terms, not what people or circumstances say… but you telling yourself how important you are… how talented you are… how smart, how strong, how wonderful.  BELIEVE, BREATHE, THRIVE.


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